May. Day.

In fine form and fashion, I've ended May 2015 in only the most appropriate way possible.  As Ivy and I headed out to try a new cafe, I decided to stop and get some gas.  Having done this in town in the past, I figured it wouldn't be a big deal.  After translating the signs and double checking just to make sure, I started filling up the tank on the car I'm currently driving, which, I might add, is borrowed from another Marine.  Thinking I'd done just fine, I started driving toward what we hoped would be some delicious local food, we got about a mile down the road, the van started driving kind of funny, and we promptly died.  On the side of a hill.  In the middle of a neighborhood.

Long story short, we met some friendly English-speaking Chinese who helped us (and by us I mean Ivy) push the Red Dragon up the hill and off the road, we waited a couple hours for a tow truck, and we made our way back to base crammed in the cab of a tow truck with an über friendly Okinawan.  

If I reflect honestly on this month, I have to say it's been a challenging one.  Move to Japan, broken leg, surgery, convalescent leave, and putting the wrong type of gas in a borrowed car.  Never did I ever think I'd be the one who got off to a rough start.  That kind of stuff doesn't happen to me, remember?  I leave things better than when I started.  How can I possibly have already caused destruction?

Your chariot, m'lady.

So friends, it's easy to see and note the good that's come from this first month on the island, but it's a heck of a lot harder for me to reconcile why this month happened the way it did.  Reminder: it's not my job to ask, "Why," but to question, "How will I handle this? What will I do with this situation? Who can I affect positively in these circumstances?"  As much as we like to say, "Oh, just give it to God.  He'll always take care of you," James 2:26 tells us, "For as the body apart from the spirit is dead, so also faith apart from works is dead." This pertains not only to big sacrificial acts of faith, but how we choose to react to the small situations in our lives.  How we treat others in the midst of frustration, how we take or deny responsibility, how we decide to choose joy over negativity, will be evidence of our faith.     

This month it became oh, so clear to me that I am human. I am not the one who causes the earth to tremble.  I am not the one who created the universe and I am certainly not at the center of that universe. I will fail, but every time I will rise to a loving God who will push me through the mess and use my shortcomings for good. 

"When anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself." -Galatians 6:3 ESV

"Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit”—yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.” -James 4:13-15 ESV

James 4 also tells us He gives more grace.  More grace than what?  More grace than our biggest mistakes.  More grace than our biggest, ugliest, most disgusting sins. Friends, he gives more grace and it is new every single day.  Whether this week, month, year, decade has been the best or worst of your life, you have a loving Father who hears you, sees your frustration, and walks beside you.     

Wobble, Baby

Suicide Cliff, near Naha

Konnichi wa! I made it to the island, and what a warm welcome it's been. God has marvelously shown his beauty here through the kindest, warmest people I've ever met and incredible scenery surrounding me in every direction.


The food, people, scenes, customs...are all incredible and affirm my choice to come to Oki. It smells, feels, looks, and acts differently than America and it's so cool to see how a different society functions.  As cool as the United States is, I understand the wanderlust mentality and the beauty that is experiencing cultures different from my own.

Not quite the desert flowers from The Land of Enchantment

Now, I didn't at all expect to be handed a uniquely challenging set of cards as soon as I got on island, but last Thursday while playing rugby, I fractured my fibula and perhaps tore a tendon in my lower leg.  I'll have surgery on the leg next Friday to install some plates and screws in the bone and potentially repair that tendon, should it in fact be torn.  Crutches for at least six weeks, shouldn't expect to be out of a boot for twelve.  These past few days have been a mix of all kinds of emotions and conversations, frustrations and speculation, but I'm finally at a place of determination and action.   
I could be totally unrealistic and say I'm not upset at all and I'm sure God has something great coming for me. When Doc told me I might be out 12 weeks, anger and bitterness were probably written all over my face. How could this happen to me? I take such good care of myself. I'm always the one going out of her way to make sure she's physically ready. Why me? Why now? I wanted to grab up my crutches, tell Doc I'd be fine, and get back to work.  I'm indestructible, the bone will heal, and that tendon will just have to be a little bit loose from now on.

Reality quickly set in and I realized I have a challenge ahead of me, and that challenge is no different than any other one I've taken on voluntarily.  It's time to show whether or not I really can handle adversity and make it a good thing.  Do I understand why I broke my fibula? No, of course I don't.  Am I frustrated? Of course I am. However, that does not illicit self-pity or discouragement because, "convinced of [God's ability to use me] I know that I will remain and continue with you all, for your progress and joy in the faith." (Philippians 1:25) and "...we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces character, and character produce hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us." (Romans 5:3-4).

At the end of the day, we all have jobs to do, both for the world and for our great God.  I have no idea what's next, but I know it is good and there's no reason to hang my head.  Even on crutches, I can and will contribute.  So friends, I think it's time to get my cast signed, block up the clutch on my car, and cut up my upper body, because there's work to be done and I want to be part of it.  I know so many of you may find yourselves in a place of discouragement, but take heart, friends, because we serve a loving God who does not cause us the pain we experience, but wants to graciously bring us out of that hurt and into the goodness of a life lived with Him.  In the meantime, enjoy this guy and enjoy the heck out of your week.

Don't worry guys, I'll be back at it in no time.